The President Who Lost Himself - South Park Shows Trump’s Micropenis After He Was Spotted With Four Band-Aids on Golf Trip

It was a hot afternoon somewhere between Monument Valley and the American soul, when a peculiar man in pants too long and with a compass that only pointed inward trudged through the dust. Donald J. Trump, 45th and 47th President of the United States, was searching for himself - or at least for a shred of greatness that had slipped away like a lost golf ball in the swamp of Mar-a-Lago.

“The people say I am the greatest,” he muttered, as a desert wind made the remnants of his red ties flutter like flags of vanity. “Nobody ever had such big… elections.” He paused as the sun beat mercilessly on his face and looked at his right hand. Four Band-Aids, carefully stacked on top of each other, like tiny flags of an invisible injury that had been in the headlines for months without ever being explained. It was as if the hand itself had decided to protest - against the relentlessness of its owner and the weight of his illusions.

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On the horizon shimmered a vision. It was no halo, no tower, no golden golf cart. It was a mirror, a gift from the desert itself - a trembling, hot surface that showed him an image even the boldest AI would not dare to generate. There he stood, stripped of all his stories, all measurements of power melted away, until only a man remained who had gotten lost in his own fairy tale.

The cacti around him seemed to whisper, the vultures to snicker. Even the stones fell silent in respect for this spectacle of exposed delusion. And somewhere in the distant mountains one could hear laughter that sounded like an echo from South Park - as if the whole nation had decided that this was the only way to cope with the tragicomedy of its present: by turning itself into a parody.

Trump lay down in the sand, stared at the sky, and for the first time he was not bigger than the country around him. Maybe, the desert thought, this was the moment when he finally found himself - in the emptiness that only a lost president can carry inside.

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